Stress and Cancer. Why it stresses me out.

My new therapist

Stress and cancer!

Today, my therapist told me I need to connect with my parasympathetic nervous system more.

I live my life at a million miles an hour.

I used to be proud of that.

Relaxing does not come naturally.

I know I need to. I want to.

But I’m a do-er.

I struggle to sit and relax.

Especially when there’s stuff that need to be ticked off.

Rightly or wrongly, my sense of self and self love are intertwined with my ability to tick stuff off a to do list. I like to achieve. It makes me feel good.

I fit a lot in. I am constantly juggling. I rarely drop balls. I plan. I am super organised. I pride myself on it.

But sometimes that drive becomes a negative force.

I get overwhelmed. I stress. I feel I can’t cope. I feel like I’m spread too thin and I’m failing at everything.

And it’s got worse since cancer. I am far more prone to overwhelm and anxiety.

During cancer treatment, I was forced to slow down a lot. It was good for me. I learnt to live in the moment. To stop trying to plan everything. To accept. To appreciate.

Somehow, I seem to have forgotten that lesson. And been sucked back into the hectic-ness of life. Taking on too much. Overcommitting. Allowing the little things to get on top of me.

So this little girl is helping me re-learn. She’s a baby. She just left her mummy. She needs lots of cuddles and a gentle touch. She’s making me be calm and slow and sit quietly. She’s bringing out the protective mama bear in me.

It’s very good for me. I can literally feel the anxiety melting.

I worry about stress being a cancer catalyst. It’s an impossible one to prove but anecdotal evidence would suggest that it may play a part. And the 5 years leading up to my cancer diagnosis were defined by big changes, drama, pressure. Stress!

And cancer or not, stress is just not good for us, on so many levels. Mental and physical.

So, after allowing myself to be sucked back into my old ways for a few months, I am back on my mission to reduce stress in my life.

To be calmer. Less driven to achieve. More present.

One kitten cuddle at a time.