Running the 40km MCC exactly a year after I finished chemo.

We ran 40km with 2300m of ascent in snow and pouring rain

The MCC is a 40km trail running race, which is part of the UTMB series and takes place around the French, Swiss and Italian Alps. It’s a pretty prestigious event to be part of. And seemed like a perfect idea as a post cancer goal.

In my past life as an athlete, a 40km trail running race would have been no big deal.

I mean it’s a long run, for sure.

With quite a lot of vertical ascent (2300m).

Crossing two countries, from Switzerland into France.

But I’ve done lots of long runs. Up and down mountains.

It’s my thing.

So, when I was offered a free place - gold dust! - I grabbed it with both hands and held on firmly with my teeth. It seemed like the perfect way to make my cancer come back.

I thought it would be easy. I thought I would bounce back fast.

I mean, I know how to train. I figured I would be able to apply my pre cancer training strategies and smash it out, like I used to.

Not so much.

Drenched and slightly deranged at the finish line. With my favourite fellow nutter, Andrea.

The experience was humbling. I did cross the finish line. In torrential rain and minus temperatures. For which I am very proud of and grateful to my body. Probably mainly thanks to my stubborn personality.

But it was a battle. Probably the hardest I’ve ever fought in a race. I came in a long way behind where I would have done in my past life. In a lot of pain.

For two days afterwards, I literally couldn’t walk. I needed crutches. It was almost funny. It turns out that running for 6 hours is too much for my hormone therapy ravaged feet.

It was a wake up call that made me realise that I am not the same as before. Cancer unfortunately means that long distance running is no longer something I can do. It’s taken a long time to come to terms with that.

Will I ever? I don’t know.

I don’t know if I want to.

I’m much less driven by racing that I used to be. I’m older and wiser. I don’t feel I need it to define my identity any more. And I think I prefer the less competitive, more relaxed version of me.

But who knows. Maybe I’ll get that competitive streak back again.

I mean, I’m turning 50 next year … that’s a new age group.

It would be very unlike me not to have a goal ;)

You can read the full account of my MCC experience here. With huge thanks to the Run the Alps team for your support.

If you have a post cancer fitness or race goal, I’d love to help! Get in touch and let’s make a plan. x